I just give up

Living in todays world just really sucks. I know things were "hard" back in the day, but damn, it just really couldn't have been as bad as it is now. I mean, what do people who make minimum wage do? How do they live? It has been a hard year, and I really HATE dwelling on it. I just keep pushing things away and focusing on other things so that the bad doesn't seem to be there, and then it just all explodes. My mom says that I am SO STRONG, I think that is a big bunch of bunk, or I could come up with solutions to problems and never really worry about them. I am really just at my wits end. So, does anyone know of a job that pays around 50,000 a year so I can pay my bills? It is just really hard to have your income cut so much and try to recover from it. Especially when there just isn't enough money.

And you know what? I really isn't "that bad". I mean all my kids are healthy and are great kids, I actually have a house to live in, for now. I have a job and friends, but the bills haven't changed since the income has and trying to juggle it all is just a bit stressful.

I think what makes me sad is something an old friend said when I went to visit in Somerset. We were talking about kids attitudes today and how in their 20's they want to live like we do in our 40's. She said, "They just don't realize that we have worked to be able to afford vacations, putting pools in, and buying cars, they want it all now!". So what makes me sad is that I am back there with the 20 somethings and can't even keep up, and it isn't just because I "want" things I can't afford. I can't afford the things I have to have!!! I just hate stepping so far back and I just can't think of anything else to do.

Like I said, I give up.