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Alan Creech
born: 09-25-1966
where: Harlan, KY
lives: Lexington, KY
married: to Liz - 21 yrs
children: 4 - Katey, Meaghan, Conor, McKenzie

 

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December 31, 2009 > 10:09 PM
thoughts on 2009
I thought since I haven't blogged much in the last little bit, I'd use this New Year's Eve opportunity to do a little retrospective of the last year, if I can remember enough to do it. I tend to be the introspective, fairly transparent type, so steer away if you don't want to wade through a little bit of it. Let's see.....
  1. This has possibly been the worst year of my life so far. Maybe not, but as I thought about it, that's one of the things that came to mind. I have always been a melancholy type, but this year, I have been more acutely depressed and have felt probably more useless and worthless than at any other time in my life. This period, in general, has been in force for more than 2 years now, but it's hit a bit of a peak this year I think. I can still be nice and polite to people. I can basically function. But almost any time I settle into a lull, into "pause," my mind/emotions spiral downward. Not really a choice one would make. So far, I have opted away from therapy and medication. That might not last much longer. We'll see.

  2. I have fished less this year than in any other year of my life thus far. Horrible. Pitiful. Just a terrible thing. This is likely a symptom of no. 1 up there. When someone like me doesn't even feel motivated to freakin' go fishing - something's wrong kids. Lately I have been very motivated to tie flies (gettin' ready to tie some right now as a matter of fact) - and I would hope this would be a positive precursor to fishing more in the new year. Again, we shall see.

  3. I believe at this point in my life, I feel more alone and isolated and friendless than at any other time. I said "I feel" - friends of mine, please don't take offense to this. This is honestly what's going on inside me right now. I feel set adrift. I feel Psalm 88... "You have taken my friends away from me; you have made me an abomination to them; I am imprisoned, and I cannot escape. ...Companion and neighbor you have taken away from me; my only friend is darkness." That's some craziness, I can tell you that. It's a very, very odd thing. I certainly hope this period doesn't last a long, long time.

  4. The job of being parent to my children is more difficult and taxing on my inner person than it has ever been. I've often said to Liz that I think I was much better at being a parent to small children... before they can talk back. I have little tolerance for even what many might call "normal" teenage "attitude." It lays a black cloud over my soul. It drains my strength away. It's hard for me to explain what it does to me. I try to deal with it, but it's very difficult for me right now. It's not funny to me at all - "hee heee, aaah teenagers, you know how teenagers are" - Well, I understand the process - went through it once, but seriously people. Of course, I want to make clear that I realize that I'm not dealing with real big problem kids here. I have good kids - I know that. Somehow, though, inside my own context, that doesn't help me much. God alone can help me - I'm pretty sure about that.

  5. Work: I realize that I have never really gotten over being fired 2 years ago. It really did a number on me. Not having been able to find a job in my field again hasn't helped much with feelings of being thrown away. The freelance Graphic Design world is rough. I've gotten a few good jobs, which I appreciate, but it's not enough. I have slowly but surely come to the realization that I have to get some other kind of job. Yeah, yeah, I know I should've done it a long time ago. There was some kind of mental block about it that I can't fully grasp. It's somehow wound up with identity and worth and shame. It's time to move into territory I'm neither comfortable, nor totally ready for.

  6. I have discovered that having pets, for me, simply isn't worth all you have to put into it. We have three (a dog and 2 cats) and on a very, very good day, that's 2 too many for me. Most regular days, I'd go for 3 too many - that equals none. I have not had the experience of animals as pets enhancing my life in a positive way like many have. I feel imprisoned by them. I feel emotionally blackmailed by them. My own human life feels too much for me to handle most of the time, with my own human family. All that other is just outside my box.
That's all I can think of right now. Sorry all that was a bit of a downer, but I'm certainly not going to sit here and make up a bunch of something to sound cheery at New Years.

I do pray for God to give me Wisdom in this new year - for Grace and Strength - for Him to heal my insides and help me to Love as I was created to Love - for guidance and direction. I'll try to listen. Amen.

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July 17, 2009 > 9:13 AM
10 cool birds
Yes, seriously. I thought of this the other day when I was at one of my son's night baseball games - at dusk and just after I heard the familiar chirpy call and started scanning the sky below the lights and there it was, a Nighthawk, awesome! That is, for me, one of those birds. There's a photo below there. So, I thought I'd post about 10 of the coolest birds I've personally seen. Sure, Puffins are cool but you know, I've never laid my eyes on one, so not on the list. Here you go - see if you can relate...


L: Common Nighthawk R: Whipoorwill
You may have seen a Nighthawk darting around under the street lights when you were playing as a kid, or, like I said, at a ballgame, and not known what it was. They love the bugs, so the lights bring them in. The two distinctive white bars on the underside of their wings give them away. And the lonely Whipoorwill - you may likely have heard the call while camping or if you live in the country. They use it in scary movies to spook up a scene from time to time, usually in the day time - stupid. Anyway, usually no one sees these cool birds, but I happened to run across one in a patch of woods on my parents' property a few years ago - bigger than I thought. Actually Nighthawks and Whipoorwills are related. You'd have to see a shot of them both sitting, very similar.


L: Osprey R: American Kestrel
I have these two together for obvious reasons - birds of prey/raptors. The Osprey is an awesome bird - not super-common where I live, but they are here and when you see one it's a sight to behold. A nickname I've heard for them is "Fish Eagle" - makes sense. They always live near water and you see what the one pictured has in it's talons. They're a big bird - as big or bigger than a Red Tailed Hawk. You'll often see them on top of telephone or electric poles, or in the tops of dead trees. The Osprey's little cousin there (actually a Falcon), is now called the American Kestrel. I say now because they were once commonly known as the Sparrow Hawk, mostly because of it's size - very small - just bigger than a sparrow probably. A beautiful bird - lots of amazing color. You'll see them sitting on electrical wires next to fields near the road, watching for mice no doubt. Very cool to see these little birds.


L: Great Horned Owl R: Ruffed Grouse
These two classics aren't in the same family but do often occupy the same territory. The Great Horned Owl is an amazing thing to see. They are an intimidating predator - very large. That head is seriously like a baby head! One lives hear our house in a wooded area - keep your cats in at night! My Dad and I were driving around the top of a mountain back home, in Harlan, one morning on a hunt and one of these monsters swooped down out of a tree and flew in front of our truck - just huge, breathtaking. The other bird there is a Ruffed Grouse - around here, just Grouse because there aren't others. They are called the king of the upland game birds - something you hunt. And I have hunted them. I say hunted, not killed. I've shot AT a bunch of them but never hit one. It's a beautiful bird - bigger than it looks like there - about the size of a chicken. The males make this "drumming" sound with their wings as they sit on top of logs during mating season - I wish you could hear it. It's more like you feel it in your chest as the "boom, boom, boom boom boom boom" echoes through the mountains. You can't tell where it's coming from - very cool. And when you get too close and they fly out from under a laurel bush in front of you, you just better have your heart medication up to date and not have to go to the bathroom real bad - ha! Loud burst of wing flutter! Great bird.


L: Tree Swallow R: Hummingbird
Two birds that are often in my back yard - fortunately. The Tree Swallow is a very pretty little bird. They dive and flit all over catching bugs - making clicking and high-pitched chirping sounds. They go a little crazy during mating season. We have a little birdhouse out back that they use as a "love shack" - ha! They haven't ever laid eggs in there, but the female will sit there on the little perch, calling away until at least two males are going back and forth for her attention. I love watching them swoop down and around during the evening, catching the bugs that might otherwise bite me. And the venerable Hummingbird. We love these birds. Liz has set up feeders in the front and back of the house to attract them each year - works like a charm. They are just amazing to watch - to hear those wing-beats fluttering and the little chirp. They're kind of magical, like watching a fairy or something, playing in your yard.


L: Kingfisher R: Pileated Woodpecker
Two impressive birds here. Kingfishers are crazy lookin' with that "hair." And that bill is like a harpoon! They sit beside streams, ponds and lakes watching for small fish to pounce on. They fly up, hover a bit, then go screaming down into the water and come up with a fish in their bill - very cool to watch. I don't see them often either but the other day, Liz and I were walking and saw one near a farm pond in our neighborhood - nice! That great bird next to him is the Pileated Woodpecker. I think a lot of people call this the "Red Headed Woodpecker" but, me included, we have been mistaken. This is a sizable woodpecker - LOUD "pecking" when you hear them. Not a common thing to see. They're kind of a back in the woods character. I've seen one, though. They look, also, a lot like the Ivory Billed Woodpecker, long thought to be extinct, but rediscovered in a remote, swampy, forest in Arkansas a few years ago. Now, that I would love to see - not to mention if I got pictures of it, I wouldn't have to worry about paying bills for a while.

OK, that's all for my birdwatching post. Feel free to share your coolest bird sightings in the comments, or if you've seen any of these. Peace.

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June 21, 2009 > 11:19 AM
some pictures and some thoughts
There's my Father's Day breakfast. No, my children didn't wake in the early hours of the morning and make it and bring it to me in bed. Half of them aren't here at the moment - Mama's at work, Meaghan's at work, Katey just came home from spending the night at a friend's, Conor just woke up and McKenzie's at Mammaw and Pappaw's house. So, I made it myself and ate it myself. A little later, Katey, Conor and I will drive to meet my parents, probably in London, to eat together with them and pick up the Kenz. Then we'll come back home and stay out of the hot some more I guess. That'll be Father's Day for us. Oh, and I received nice cards from each of my children and a gift card to Sportsman's Warehouse - very nice.

Here is the product of my labor yesterday in the garden. The tomatoes were getting a bit large, so I had to make a trip to Lowe's and get some wire fencing and stakes to cage them bad boys up. At the Garden Mother's suggestion (no, I'm not a pagan, I'm talking about Liz), I also made a climbing fence deal for the cucumbers there so they don't take over the garden. It was good, monastic work. I look forward to more of it as the crops develop. We also did a good bit of weeding, in which I took a good part, in the last couple of days. Along with the rain making what we planted go nuts, it also had fed the weeds a good bit, so we had to thin things out.

As I was weeding I had a thought about the Scripture that tells us - generally speaking here - to just let the weeds and the wheat (crops) grow together, not to possibly uproot what you're trying to grow by going nuts pulling out all the weeds. Sure - make sense. Here's my thought: this is really more about not weeding in the younger, more tender years of your plants. You have possibly noticed that weeds and crop plants look a lot alike in the early days - hard to tell apart - and easy to pull up one with the other if you're too worried about it. You've got to be careful. But, when my tomatoes, for example, get more mature, larger, their identity is much more defined as something distinctly different than any weed around them. Weeding, at this point, can be important. Too many weeds can "steel" nutrients from the growing tomatoes, and water. Nice spiritual analogy there I think. And it helps to pull the pesky weeds out by the roots - otherwise they just grow back up too quickly. And mulch helps - that ground cover around and between your plants to keep in moisture and retard week growth. We use mowed grass clippings - works pretty well. Ah, the analogies keep on flowing at this point. Weeding, mulching, watering, staking and caging to guide the growth and protect them from high winds, etc. Lay that over your life and see where it fits. Peace to you.

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March 15, 2009 > 2:05 PM
weird
Sometimes I think I have the weirdest life - just odd. I have a hard time getting a handle on it sometimes. I want things it seems I can never have. I've had things it seems I'll never have again. I just keep going because that's what you do. I could sit down, think way too hard, and just fall apart sometimes I think. But I don't. And this is certainly not the kind of blog post that'll get my readership up - poor, pitiful, narcissistic bastard (and I had to look up how to spell narcissistic). I'll try for something a little more edifying next time, both to myself and to you. Pax vobiscum.

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February 06, 2009 > 6:21 PM
thinkin' things
Too much time on my hands - the mind starts crankin'.
  1. It may be unreasonable, but I feel alone. Can't shake it.
  2. What's up with your kids not wanting to hug you? And that's the girls, ironically.
  3. I think tonight, I will tie some flies - that'll be good for me.
  4. I wonder, too often, whether I've wasted myself in significant ways.
  5. I really, really need to get on the ball and get in better physical shape.

  6. Love is never rude - that's simple, right? Simple.
  7. Love keeps no record of wrongs - it does not brood over injuries - it is not irritable or resentful - that's not as simple, but it's still simple, right? Simple.

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January 20, 2009 > 5:41 PM
unwearied
The Antiphon for the Psalm of Monday night's Compline (Night Prayer) is as follows...

O Lord, our God, unwearied is your love for us.

Each time Monday rolls around and I'm praying this before I got to sleep at night, I linger at the Antiphon for just a bit, and sometimes repeat it. Unwearied, it says. God is not worn out by us. He is not impatient with us. The love of our Lord for us does not grow tired - ever. That's hard for us to comprehend. Some of us just flat cannot comprehend it. I believe it. I "see" it - not fully, of course, but I do, and my heart is grateful.

I am a pretty decent Father, I think. But, I get weary of it sometimes. It wears me out sometimes.

I'm a pretty good husband most of the time. I love my wife very much. But my love for her is sometimes weary, sometimes it's just not what it could be.

As a friend, I don't know what I am. That's hard for me to say. I feel out of practice lately. But I know I am not unwearied by it, by people, even those I love dearly - maybe tired of being what I'm supposed to be to them.

It's probably good that I realize that, though - that I am not yet perfect - that I am still a failure sometimes - that I am not what I was created to be yet. If I were to have the attitude that I had nowhere to go, then perhaps I would stop traveling. I have a long way to go and therefore, I am very thankful that He who deals with me has an unwearied love for me.

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January 10, 2009 > 9:54 PM
time for another shot > freedom


Just need to hear it again - and share it. Peace.

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December 08, 2008 > 3:37 PM
hand-crafted rosaries for sale
A while back I started making my own rosaries - of the one-decade variety, with an Irish penal style spin. You can read this post to get the general idea. One thing I've changed since then is going away from hemp and on to braided cotton twine. The hemp just frayed too much - too hard to work with as well. So, these new ones are of the same design - Franciscan (San Damiano silver crucifix), natural, simple, one-decade (only one set of 10 beads with two "Our Father" beads), and a finger loop at the end so you can hold on to it as you pray (modeled after the Irish penal rosary style).

So, I thought, why not a little cottage, monastic industry here? No reason at all. And off we go...

Yes, I'm Catholic and the rosary is basically a Catholic Christian prayer tool, although prayer beads are used by people even in other religions. Anglican Christians also use prayer beads from time to time. For those of you who are Catholic and are already familiar with praying the rosary, no problem - you can just add one of these to your collection and keep it in your pocket like I do. But these simple rosaries can also be used by Christians of other traditions as well. Nobody's 'gonna smack you if you don't pray the Hail Mary on the ten beads. :) You have my blessing to use it in whatever way will best help you in your spiritual life. I will include a small card with each rosary with a very simple layout of the prayers prayed on this rosary. It won't be every traditional prayer associated with the rosary, just the high-spots.

Hand-crafted, Franciscan, one-decade rosaries by Alan Creech



Wood bead rosaries
  1. Oval wooden beads
    Tan colored braided cotton string
    Silver Celtic knotted Our Father beads
    Knots in-between each bead
    Finger loop in one end
    Silver San Damiano crucifix

  2. Rectangular cubed wooden beads
    Tan colored braided cotton string
    Silver Celtic knotted Our Father beads
    Knots in-between each bead
    Finger loop in one end
    Silver San Damiano crucifix

  3. Round wooden beads
    Medium brown colored braided cotton string
    Silver Celtic knotted Our Father beads
    Silver spacers in-between each bead
    Finger loop in one end
    Silver San Damiano crucifix



Horn bead rosaries
  1. Square, brown cubed horn beads
    Medium brown colored braided cotton string
    Silver Celtic knotted Our Father beads
    Knots in-between each bead
    Finger loop in one end
    Silver San Damiano crucifix

  2. Square, red cubed horn beads
    Medium brown braided cotton string
    Silver Celtic knotted Our Father beads
    Knots in-between each bead
    Finger loop in one end
    Silver San Damiano crucifix
When ordering, please specify using this code: W1, W2, W3 (for wooden bead rosaries), and H1, H2 (for horn bead rosaries).

Each rosary is $10.00 US plus shipping and handling (not sure how much that is yet - I'll let you know).

If you'd like to buy one, please send me an e-mail by clicking this link. Please include your shipping address and specify which rosary you want. I have several pre-made and I'll be making more. I'll let you know approximately how long it will take as well as the shipping costs in an e-mail. We can also work out payment. Thank you in advance and God's Grace and Peace be with you.

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December 06, 2008 > 9:02 PM
more 6 degrees
Yeah, that's right, more 6 degrees of separation, so what? It was fun last time - most comments I've had in a while. I started thinking about some names from here and there in my past. Here are three men I have met, or known somehow, in person - one degree baby - that means two for many of you. Don't you feel special. I've got a few more, but lets go three at a time, OK? OK.



They are pictured alphabetically by last name so I won't offend anyone - ha! Ah, let me start at the beginning: It was a slow day in the store. We had recently moved from a smaller location across the street. I was holding down the fort alone that afternoon when two men came strolling in to browse. I think I saw him before he came in with his friend - then - yes, sure enough, Albert Finney! Holy crap! This guy is big - not just your run of the mill TV star or something - this was Ebenezer Scrooge! This was Daddy Warbucks! And, of course, many other great characters. He was in jeans, dressed very casually. I let them have their space and when the opportunity arose, I asked, "so, what brings you to Lexington Mr. Finney?" He was very pleasant, very nice, responding that he was visiting a friend who had a horse farm locally. I now almost always refer to him as "my buddy Albert Finney."

Many of you will not recognize the next striking figure. When I was involved in a small charismatic church here in Lexington, we used to have a visiting preacher from time to time. He was the Pastor of a very small store-front church in Charleston, West Virginia - an extremely dynamic preacher. He was dearly loved by the congregation. When he came, I was usually responsible for seeing to his needs, which weren't many, so we talked. He wont' remember me now but we met many times and hugged and even ate dinner together at least once. Once he was in rare form and prophesied over me, holding me tightly after he had already sweated through three layers of suit, until my knees buckled and I hit the floor. Bishop T. D. Jakes - you've likely heard of him now. Oh, and he tried to counsel my wayward Pastor, at one time, after he had committed adultery and was trying to split the church up. His counsel was not followed unfortunately. I'm not a big proponent, these days, of the kind of charismatic business I was a big part of some time ago. That's not to say I don't believe much of it is legitimately a part of the Christian life. Anyway, from what I saw of the man up close, what I heard, and what I hear from time to time now, I may not totally agree with him but I do have a respect for him. Some of you won't understand that, but oh well. Consistency, I think, and from all I ever knew, integrity.

I have to shorten these stories. Lefty Kreh is the next on the list. Most of you won't know who Lefty is from Adam. He's a pretty famous American Fly Fisherman. He's helped develop new ways to cast, to build rods, new flies, etc. for a few decades now. Once upon a time a friend and I went to fish the famous waters of South Central Pennsylvania - the Letort Spring Run and Yellow Breeches Creek. As we pulled up to hit the Letort for the first time it was like - well, like sneaking into the Grand Ole Opry to play your music when nobody's there - except - today - all the characters we had read about in books, etc. were there, having a picnic, right there! We were at Charlie Fox's house (yeah, I know you don't know him either, but anyway...) and they were there! Lefty, Ed Shenk, old Charlie, Bob Clouser, and who knows who else. Through an odd series of events that day, we ended up meeting a great old guy named Jack Hunter - who invited me to come to the picnic (of The Letort Regulars) the next year. So, hell yes, I drove 8.5 hours to fish and hang out with legendary fishermen! I sat and talked to Lefty on the banks of the Letort, listening to him tell dirty jokes and talk about the old days. Good stuff. The next day I caught a gorgeous 16" Brown Trout upstream of Charlie's house at Bonny Brook. That's a great memory.

So much for shortening the stories. I had three more up there but I'll save them for the next installment. Peace.

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December 04, 2008 > 4:38 PM
fun stuff > 6 degrees
You know you've heard of this 6 degrees of separation thing. Allegedly, someone came up with this equation that we are all no more than 6 degrees separated from anyone in the world - something like that. For some weird reason I was thinking about this yesterday and a couple of names popped into my mind and I started counting back the degrees - aaagghh! It's crazy how close you can get to even historical figures! Now, I'm not sure what the official "rule" is but I'm counting even those who have met the people involved in the chain. It's easier that way. Here are two interesting ones for me - with photos...

> > > >

That's me, of course, my old boss Bob Bridges from Asbury Seminary, who went on vacation one year and ended up sitting knee to knee with Julia Roberts, with whom he had a nice conversation, then Oprah, you know Julia knows Oprah, and you know who Oprah knows, that dude there, El Presidente, Barack Obama = Alan is 4 degrees away from the President Elect.

> > > > >

Me, again, then a non-picture of another old boss of mine, Dick Broadbent (thoroughbred industry here in Lexington), who has met Queen Elizabeth because she actually came to their offices once when she was in town on horse bitniss, who knew her Father (ya think?), King George VI, who undoubtedly knew David Lloyd George, former (at that time) Prime Minister of England and still in politics, who sat face-to-face with none other than the Big Fella Himself, Michael Collins, as they were hashing out the 1921 Anglo-Irish agreement = Alan is 5 degrees away from Michael Collins! Fairly cool.

AND - special addition: If you count having been in very close proximity to and seeing with their own eyes, here are two more Presidents...

> >

You know me already, who knows my own Dad pretty well (that's him as a scruffy kid in the 1940s, who lived for a year with his family in Baltimore, Maryland during WW II as my Grandfather worked in a shipyard (then back to the mountains and the coal mines). One day he and his brother were running around in a train station in Baltimore, some men came by and said to them both, "move out of the way boys and let the President of the United States through" - then Franklin Delano Roosevelt was rolled by in his wheel chair. I told my Dad he should have stopped him and let him know what his own middle name was: Harold D. Creech (you guess). :) All = Alan being only 2 degrees removed from FDR. Nice.

> >

OK, last one for today: Yours truly knows my Uncle Herman Nelson (Mother's older brother), who has retired from both the Army and the Air Force (really) - while in the latter, he was a part of SAC - the Strategic Air Command. They once had a troop review for the then President, Dwight D. Eisenhower, who shook all their hands as he passed = Alan is also only 2 degrees separated from Ike. Pretty funny. I wonder how many other Presidents I can come up with.

I might even be closer than I think, and so might you. I'm going to try and figure out some other cool ones. I'm sure I'll get tired of this but for now, it's kinda fun. Peace.

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November 19, 2008 > 6:04 PM
oh my goodness
Yeah, I know, lame post title. Who knows what the post is about when you say something like "oh my goodness"? Did something bad happen? Did something good happen? What is it?

None of those things. I just felt like saying it. Today has just been a blah, nothing, emotionally down sort of day. Don't know what else to tell you. Just not the best day.

I feel disconnected and wasted. I've got a lot else I could say, but pitifully, I'm afraid to say it. OK, log this under poor pitiful me. Over.

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November 14, 2008 > 11:09 AM
goin' to the woods
In a little bit, I'm heading off to the woods to go camping this weekend with several other big 'ole boys - well, most of us are pretty big. Should be a good time to get away and chillax for a bit. Yes, I know it's going to be cold and maybe snow a little. We'll be fine. The cast of characters is a little frightening, so pray for us: Me (of course), Kevin Rains, Chris Marshall, Paul McGillivary, Glenn Johnson and Bill Bean. Let us pray - Lord have mercy, Christ have mercy, Lord have mercy.

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November 13, 2008 > 5:53 PM
new widgets
I set myself up as an Amazon Affiliate yesterday. I've done this before, quite a while back. Very handy. If you buy from Amazon by clicking through from my link, I get a referral fee per item sold. That's good. Me havin' more money right now is very good - not because of greed, mind you, but of necessity. I don't have as much traffic as I used to, but hopefully this and Google ads and anything else might help some. When I had this before, it was for a church and another group, and it actually did generate a little revenue. Every little bit helps, so there you go.

Anyway, on the left is a general link, and on the right sidebar are two boxes - one is my recommendations (not just books, but other things I recommend to you) and the other is my Amazon wish list (in case you, my dear friends and loved ones, want to buy something for me some time). That's that - just a little blog business announcement. Peace to all in this house.

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October 26, 2008 > 12:09 PM
politico
Don't get too excited, this won't be long. I don't very often at all write about politics except to say here and there that I and my informed conscience cannot, do not participate. I've talked about some of the reasons why in the past on this blog. It always illicits very interesting responses. These responses, for me, often tend to add very solid blocks to my building of reason for not taking part.

You never see - almost never - the kind of emotional rancor tossed around by those on either side of the political divide, in any other Christian arena (wait, maybe theology - there are ways to and not to do that too - be careful). I know, I know, you all have very good, morally sound reasons for all that. And don't get me saying that all debate is bad and rancorous - it is not. It need not be. But what we have generally is not any kind of healthy debate. It's just hatred disguised as... well, not disguised very well as anything. And all hatred need not be full-on, total hatred. A little hatred here, a little hatred there - it all adds up to a much bigger, collective pile of... you know, hatred. And that's not Love > and that's not God > at all > don't even try it.

Our American political system is not the only one in the world. Shocker. It doesn't even encompass within its systemic bounds the greatest number of people in the world, not by a long shot. Capitalism is not God's chosen economic vehicle to bring His Kingdom to fullness on the earth - holy crap, I just said that! And neither is the governmental system of a Republic or a Democracy, and no, neither is Communism, Socialism or Totalitarianism. The only system of government I remember having any reliable record of God being involved in directly was Monarchy, and yeah, those Judges and all that. Here's the deal on all those systems: They are imperfect ways to deal with a broken, heard-hearted, sinful and stiff-necked people > US. None of them are ideal. None of them was or is God's ideal plan for mankind. Israel for a time and the Church now are what we have as the closest thing to what God wants for us - and even these things would not have been necessary if we had not fallen into darkness.

OK, this is getting too long. I know I'm supposed to be some kind of disobedient, ignorant, uninformed whatever by saying this, but I cannot, with any semblance of a good conscience, step into the political arena, by voting or mostly otherwise. I feel I'm stepping into a battle that is not mine - into a land of deep division and hatred - into taking sides among God's people. I say this of myself and of my conscience. I will not fully universalize these convictions and spread them around to all my friends and to those I don't know who choose to participate in the system. I do not believe it is somehow inherently evil or bad to do this. I just know I can't, and I know I have come to this position in a very informed and educated way. I am not apathetic. If you don't vote, etc. because you just don't care - that's not a good reason for anything - figure yourself out. Study, think, pray, read, inform yourself and be informed.

I will pray for the election. I will pray for whomever is elected. I will pay my taxes and obey the law (pretty much, you know, speeding and all that). Mostly, though, I hope I can focus my energy on doing work, some kind of work, for and in the Kingdom of God, in the Church and around the Church (to and with everyone as an ambassador of Christ). That's all for now. And if you're going to comment, you don't have to agree with me (honestly) but please be respectful. Don't preach or assume that I'm stupid - please. Pax vobiscum.

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October 25, 2008 > 1:08 PM
sometimes....
I feel - like a motherless child
some times - I feel - like a motherless child
some times - I feel - like a motherless child
a long - way - from my home

FREEEDOM - FREEEEDOM - FREEEEDOM

sometimes I feel - like I'm almost gone
sometimes - I feel - like I'm almost gone
some - times - I - feel - like I'm almost gone
a long long long - way from my home

I gotta telephone in my bosom
and I can call Him up from my heart
I gotta telephone in my bosom
and I can call Him up from my heart

when I need my brother
when I need my father
mother
sister
when I need my brother
mother - mother

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October 24, 2008 > 11:00 PM
freedom > from my heart
Just a great, great performance. I've always loved this live version of Freedom/Motherless Child by Richie Havens at Woodstock. For some reason it resonates with something deep in me. I'm not even sure I can totally explain it. Just watch and listen.

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October 04, 2008 > 8:48 PM
st. francis...


Ora pro nobis - Pray for us.


The old boy sits in our front flower garden. This is his feast day, by the way. He was Liz's last birthday present. I ask him to pray for us as I pass the statue often.

I'm not sure I thought of it till now, but it was probably appropriate that I spent today in the woods, or a good chunk of it. I went to my parents' house. About two-thirds of their 7 acres or so is heavily wooded. Lots of big Oak trees, some Locusts, Pines, etc. Today our goal was to down a big dead Oak that had been standing back there for two or three years. That's the upper part of it there in the center on the right - pretty good sized tree.

So, my Dad, my son Conor and I headed up to the woods, surveyed the situation and I went to work like a lumberjack. I guess I've watched enough on TV to know how to notch the tree properly and cut the rest from the back with a chainsaw. Let me tell you, it was scary as crap. I had to stop a few times as I was cutting in and step back to take a breath. After all that, it fell just where we planned, with great force, and we drove home with a truck-load of wood for burning in our fireplace this Fall/Winter. I'm grateful for the free wood. I'm grateful no one was hurt. I'm grateful for my parents. I'm grateful for my children. I'm grateful for my wife. I'm grateful we still have a house to live in and food to eat.

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September 22, 2008 > 9:17 AM
musical treat
This weekend was a treat for the kid here. Our church, Christ the King, has an Oktoberfest festival every year. It acts as a big fundraiser for the church and a huge chunk of fun for the whole community. One of the funnest parts is the music. Whoever gets the acts in for this thing - and this whole deal is free to get into mind you - knows somebody. Last year I told you about seeing Peter Buck from R.E.M. there. Also, Mark Olson from the Jayhawks fame was there as well. Mark was back this year with his old friend Gary Louris, both of the original Jayhawks. They did a great set together on Saturday. I took several photos and a couple of videos of them playing. Great stuff. Here are a few more photos on my Flickr page.

Last year when I heard Mark play a set on his own, he was playing songs from his solo album The Salvation Blues, which I then went home and bought. Great album. I posted a bit of a review on it last year about this time. The music that Mark wrote and played on this album was a part of his own recovery from depression concerning life-events. It has been therapeutic for me as well. I had in mind to thank him for this album in person, and so I did. Seems a nice guy.

Later that night I even found an old Jayhawks CD at the Half-Price Bookstore for $4 - cool! I wish I had been more aware of them earlier - good stuff. There are both Gary and Mark from Saturday on the left there. Just these guys and their guitars. It was a great set. Apparently there were a good number of old Jayhawks fans there as there was a standing ovation and an encore. Anyway, it was a good day for me and I thought I'd share it with you.

I saw my old friend Tim Welch as well, who's a drummer in local bands - good to see him again. Yesterday we canned 7 more quarts of tomatoes! So far, as we've done the figuring in my head, we've canned approximately 600 tomatoes - good Lord. And the vines are still pretty full. There will be at least one more canning. I think I'm going to try to make some sun-dried tomatoes with some of them too. We'll see. That's it for now - lots of deep stuff there, I know. Peace.

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