I like this picture. I took it at the pond where I fish sometimes. I was trying to find something that reflected how I'm feeling right now. There's certainly reflection there of a kind I suppose. But it's more the distant, a bit alone, somewhat isolated, in-between worlds feeling I mean. I think it does a sufficient job.
I certainly wish all this internal turmoil would take a permanent vacation. And it's really a very hard thing for me to explain. You can give me encouraging words if you want. You may not attempt to kick my ass and tell me to "just get over it" or something akin to that. Now if you know me really well and you know enough to talk to me like that, that's another story - we may be able to sit and personally hash some things out.
I honestly have never had a period like this where I can't quite get rid of that heavy heavy feeling of "weight" in my chest. Well, not in a long time. I think that may be part of the problem. Maybe I've had it too easy for a while. Boy, that's ironic. Easy? What the hell? OK, I know all this is very cryptic. I just needed to "say something" - I process like that. I'm actually doing some better - just not quite "there" yet - whatever "there" is. Peace to you. Peace to me.
038
August 14, 2007
> 11:28 AM
